Sunday, November 30, 2008

Dye Day

I have been toying with the idea of growing a pomegranate tree one because I am one of the strange people that love eating the fruit and second, I thought it could be potentially a great source of natural dye. I read several places that only the skin is used for dye and not the seeds. I could not find a reason why the seeds were not being used since the juice on the seeds dyes everything it touches. Not finding a reason I have decided to try to dye with both the skin and the seeds. I am boiling the skin for about an hour. I have taken the fruit/seeds and put them in a pot on the stove on simmer. My thinking hopefully the juice will come out of the fruit and I can try to dye with it. There may not be enough from 2 pomegranates but it's worth a try. I'll update later.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

10 Rules for Thanksgiving dinner at my house

I may have a warped sense of humor but I found these entertaining.

1. Don't get in line asking questions about the food. "Who made the potato salad? Is there egg in it? Are the greens fresh? Is the meat in the greens turkey or pork? Who made the macaroni and cheese? What kind of pie is that? Who made it? Ask one more question and I will punch you in your mouth, knocking out all your front teeth so you will not be able to eat anything.
2. If you can't walk or are missing any limbs, sit your ass down until someone makes your plate for you. Dinner time is not the time for you to be independent. Nibble on them damn pecans and walnuts to hold you over until someone makes you a plate.
3. If you have kids under the age of twelve, I will escort their little asses to the basement and bring their food down to them. They are not going to tear my damn house up this year. Tell them that they are not allowed upstairs until it's time for Uncle Butchie to start telling family stories about their mommas and papas.
4. There is going to be one prayer for Thanksgiving dinner! JUST ONE! We do not care that you are thankful that your 13 year old daughter gave birth to a healthy baby or your nephew just got out of jail. Save that talk for somebody who gives a damn. The time limit for the prayer is one minute. If you are still talking after that one minute is up, you will feel something hard come across your lips and they will be swollen for approximately 20 minutes.
5. Finish everything on your plate before you go up for seconds! If you don't, you will be cursed out and asked to stay your greedy ass home next year!
6. BRING YOUR OWN TUPPERWARE!! Don't let me catch you fixing yourself a plate in my good Tupperware knowing damn well that I will never see it again! Furthermore, if you didn't bring anything over, don't let me catch you making a plate period or it will be a misunderstanding.
7. What you came with is what you should leave with!! Do not leave my house with anything that doesn't belong to you. EVERYBODY WILL BE SUBJECTED TO A BODY SEARCH COMING AND GOING OUT OF MY DOMAIN!!!
8. Do not leave your kids so you can go hopping from house to house. This is not a DAY-CARE CENTER ! There will be a kid-parent roll call every ten minutes. Any parent that is not present at the time of roll call, your child will be put outside until you come and get him or her. After 24 hours, I will call DHS on your ignorant ass!!
9. BOOK YOUR HOTEL ROOM BEFORE YOU COME INTO TOWN!! There will be no sleeping over at my house! You are to come and eat dinner and take your ass home or to your hotel room. EVERYBODY GETS KICK THE HELL OUT AT 11:00 pm. You will get a 15 minute warning bell ring.
10. Last but not least! ONE PLATE PER PERSON!! This is not a soup kitchen. I am not trying to feed your family until Christmas dinner! You will be supervised when you fix your plate. Anything over the appropriate amount will be charged to you before you leave. There will be a cash register at the door. Thanks to Cousin Alfred and his greedy ass family, we now have a credit card machine! So VISA and MasterCard are now being accepted. NO FOOD STAMPS OR ACCESS CARDS YET!

Sunday, November 09, 2008

Texas in October

Pictures taken in early October 2008 coming back from Del Rio Texas. This is the South Llano River. Despite it being 85 degrees the water was ice cold. No I couldn't resist stepping into it. It does my heart good knowing that there are places left in the world that the water is crystal clear.